What happened to the good old days, when boy meets girl. Boy goes up to Girl and ask her on a date, acting all nervous. Girl says yes. It is in Boys nature to go pick Girl up at home, If she does still live with Folks, he goes in and meet Dad, shake his hand. Dad freaks him out a bit, by saying things he will do to Boy if he fucks Girl around. Boy takes Girl out, they have a great time, getting to know each other, for the first time really. Boy takes girl home and if they like each other, they make out at the door and Girl closes the door behind herself.
I know it sounds retro and all, but damn, those were the good old days, even if I never experienced it myself. The reason I didn’t experience that time: In 1983 the Motorola markets created the first portable cellular phone for consumers (weighing in at twenty-eight ounces). This little breakthrough opened up the possibility for the first mobile booty calls.
Yes, I blame cell phones for this crazy world of love today. It’s hard to explain why. But it is hard to have a good relationship. I personally feel phones and technology takes the spark away between two people, cos you tend to get each other all wrong. But on mxit, you get emoticons, which helps a bit.
I was in a Relationship with a guy for a while. I won’t mention his name again, cos I seem to use him for a lot of examples (now you all know who I am talking about). The first night we met, I thought he was a moron and didn’t give him my number, 5 months later we run into each other, and I still thought he was a moron. (And a matter of fact, I still think he is one today)…Back to the story. So he asked me again for my number. I refused to give it to him. I thought, ok, Buster, I am listed in the telephone book if you want to find me, go look me up. Show me some effort. To my surprise, a couple of tequilas down the throat, I was tipsy, in Springbok (Stellenbosch), dancing with a pole with my Winnie the Pooh T-shirt and a short denim skirt and of course my cowboy boots (call the fashion police)…oh and did I mention a Sarita (the best cider in the world at that time, I am now a sophisticated red wine sipper) in the hand, which isn’t the kind of drink that would make you all lazy and drunk….it makes you happy and drunk…I was having the best time singing along with Fall Out Boy, acting all crazy, as I am known for. So He walks into the bar. He had been following me to every place I went to. Cornered me and asked me again for my number, which I refused to give him and left him and his long face standing in the corner with his Cane and Coke…Sad….I went off to play a game of pool with my mate, and he came over to watch me play, which was nerve wrecking since I have NO ball sense. But my 5 lucky cows licks helped me out….hehe…He told me that I should come find him after the game, since he could see that he has a lot of competing to do with the other bloke, which wasn’t true really. But I made it look like it was. And obviously I didn’t go off to find him, I found another Sarita and I found the pole…(I am not a stripper, I don’t show my panties, I just hold onto the pole for stability and when you are a student you think it is funny). When I walked out on my way home, I was cornered once again by Him. He asked my best mate for my number, she gave him hers, for some drunken reason or arrangement to get mine, but I gave up. I just gave him my fucking number, since my whole plan was clearly not going to work. I laid down my rules of dating men, by stating, he comes pick me up at my house, meet my dad, take me to dinner and take me home. If I like him, I will peck him and he gets a second date…the other date rules come later. He was convinced I will marry him by the fifth date…
So the whole, I mean like in the whole, week, he texts me. I got one phone call. We sort of got to know each other through the text messages. I knew that his favorite TV channel was Cartoon network, he drove a Black Rav 4, he is a closet hermit (It sounds gay, but he told me that he was one), he had 2 brothers, he is 2.1 meters, he loves rugby, he thinks that I will make a great mother for his children one day, blah blah….Now, I found this out before our first date! We have only met twice before! Dancing in FTV one night with each other, and the other time in Stellenbosch. We didn’t talk much and we haven’t even kissed. He knew that I was addicted to American idol and loved Simon, always bought Wacky Wednesday Specials from Steers, and I don’t know what else he knows, but I am sure he knows a bit.
Obviously the text messages were flirty as well, him saying he cant wait to see me, and when were our first date gonna be, what am I wearing (flannel pj’s), he bets I make flannels look sexy (how cheesy), etc. By the time we had our first date, we were so shy actually, for knowing all that from each other. We didn’t last longer than a month. I told him that I thought that our relationship needed more physical action, than talk/text and no action.
First dates are there to get to know each other in the flesh. But instead we mxit at night and text like mad. We over share things that only need to be known when you are face to face.
It is in a girls nature these days, to have your phone with you, checking if he has called, thinking if you should say ‘hi’, or whatever. But the secret is, even from the golden days, girls are never supposed to phone, or in fact ladies don’t phone So I guess we are all ho’s…haha…No, but it is the right thing to do, Don’t call. It is a man’s job.
In the golden days, it was hard for a guy to go up to a girl and ask her out on a date. Why did God decide to make it easier for men to ask woman out. Why did He make man so intelligent to create technology, too make it easier for men to ask out woman…Today if Boy wants to ask out Woman, he emails her “Hey, How you doing (In the Joey from friends accent, do note), how bout dinner tonight.”
Ok, clearly there is no other way to ask a girl out, these days, but I must say, and I think most women will agree with me, that a man that phones, will get a “yes” more easily. It shows us that he have the guts. It is easy for a boy to text a chick and ask her out, and if she says ‘no’, his ego won’t be that scarred. If you want to ask a girl out, yes you do ask for her number, but challenge yourself, and ask her “Hey, can I take you out to dinner sometime?” before you take her number, it will show her you have guts and you will get lots of respect. The only reason you should have her number is to confirm the date, and to phone her afterwards. But if you have difficulties in asking her out, phone her instead of texting, cos it cost more money and it is more respectable…
Ask yourself this question, “How did people hook up with no Cell phones?” Unless you were there to experience it firsthand, pre-cell phone hooking up remains an unsolved mystery that is tainted by outlandish theories(For instance, maybe the guy had to climb into his snazzy little car, and call you from his R200-per-minute car phone) The bottom line is that if we didn’t have these instant forms of communication (like text messages, mxit and IM), just hooking up with someone would be dating, because you you’d actually have to put more than just minimal effort into making something happen.
Today:
1. Text messaging is the new phone call
2. IM is the new face to face conversation (if you have a web cam, then it is a bonus)
3. Caller id is the new *69 ( Which is not Foolproof, because his/her Caller ID will pretty much give you away every time. Just remember the motto: Straight to voicemail, you’re in luck; if it rings even once, you are fucked.)
Cell phones are running our lives. To some people it is ruining love lives. To some of you it is ruining non-existent love lives, which I am guilty of, but I choose to not have one, not because I am miserable, I just love the power it gives me. I love being unavailable, even if I am sooooo available…I wont tell you why but I have a damn good reason.* (I am not available anymore)
If we didn’t have cell phones, guys would ask you out face to face, you wont have to stare at your cell phones hoping he would phone or text. And the cool thing is, if he does phone he will phone you on the land line at night. Just like in the good old days.
And another thing is Cell phones are tempting. Me and my Girl Friends, tend to text guys just because we are bored and love sick….Which shouldn’t be done at all. It is silly. Cos a lot of times, guys don’t tend to text back at all, they ignore. But I must tell you, it irritates the shit out of me as well, when a guy text me the whole damn time. When I was dating the moron that you read about earlier, I would start laughing sometimes, picturing a 2.1 meter boy, sitting with his little cell phone, texting me. It is a funny image to me.
One sms leads to another, and soon after that you will see you sent each other 40 sms’s. While a telephone call, would have lasted 10 minutes (that is the amount of time it should last when you are in the early stages of dating or just about to start). When you communicate through all the technology of today, people can get the wrong impression, and we tend to be very daring, flirting too much and saying too much in texts, while when you are face to face, you bring out the real you.
I’ll say it one more time, to finish off my thought: If a Guy asks a girl out, it shows her that he have the guts, but when he texts, and she says no, there is not much harm done to his ego, which is cowardly. And since it is hard to do it that way these days, before you take her number, ask her out, and just use the number as a date confirmation. It will do you more justice.
Real Men Phone, and that is actually my point…When I say real Men, I mean it, cos Boys text….But if you are just friends it is fine, but If you expect a date, up your telephone bills. It’s time to bring old school back...
I forgot to mention, what is up with all the breakup smses these days! Not cool guys, break ups are supposed to be passionate and screaming and not “it’s nt u, its me, u dnt do it anymre, dnt call me, ur mother is a milf, btw….l8erz, Max :p” I mean come on….(no I did not receive an sms like this in my life, it was just how I pictured my mate being dumped). You won’t be getting possible break up sex this way, so go the old school way, there is still a chance for a last play date.
0 comments:
Post a Comment